Prom Night

Sorry I missed connecting with you all yesterday morning. I woke up with a gnarly headache and needed to rid myself of it before my last work day for the week.

I'm up early today and at Peet's coffee enjoying iced coffee and a pretzel braid. It's a gorgeous morning here on the coast and I'm pretty sure I want to spend as much of my life living near an ocean as possible.

Jeff Buckley's "Last Goodbye" from the Grace album is on my Ipod right now. This is an album I recommend everyone have. It's just that good.

Last night I went to prom. No, not a high school prom. (I'm single, but not THAT single.) My friends' Todd and Dawn were celebrating their 10 year wedding anniversary. They decided on a prom theme. Everyone was dressed up in their cheesy goodness and I got a second wearing of my Double Quinceanera dress .

The hall was awesomely decorated with balloons and a balloon arch, and tons of streamers. There was sherbert punch, cake and prom photos. It was just like all the proms I went to. (Well, except for the beer and wine.)

I went to dances in high school. By no means, was I a popular kid. But I always had a boyfriend or date and went to all but 2 dances in my time in high school. My high school friends were right there with me. For many years afterward, I just figured that this was everyone's experience. In high school, you went to dances.

For some of my friends this was not the case. As an adult, I know people who never went to a single dance in high school. Some did not go by choice. But others, did not go out of fear and shame and other negative feelings.

I have been in conversation with these people about this (as some of them are my favorite people on God's green earth) and when you get to the heart of it, it brings back that silly high school dynamic. It is still a wierd class dividing line that will forever be there. People who went to dances and the people who did not.

Going to dances never made me feel better than anyone. I went to dances in high school because that's what you did. But to some folks who didn't go to dances, it casts me in a different light. It's the "normal" high school experience that I had, that they never did. One of those things from growing up that no one can reconcile.

It's that way with a lot of things we all go through. As much as we can work to get healing and reconcile things, there are things that will always make us flinch or make us rub the scar that has been there for a long time. And I know that the world wil tell us to suck it up, to get over it.

I think part of our job is to serve each other, espeically in those times. Serve with a loving and listening heart even if our experiences have been different. To be aware of the hurt and to not reinforce that hurt or injure each other further.

One of my favorite parts of last night was that for the prom photos, everyone could be prom king or queen. There was a sash and a crown that we could wear and pose with. Everyone could have their turn as royalty.

I really hope for some of my friends that last night was a healing experience. They could finally say they went to prom. Or they could finally say that they had a great time at a dance.

I hope as we all grow and heal that we can find our crowns in the dirt, dust them off and wear them like we were suppossed to be doing all along.

P.S- Here are some more songs I listened to as I wrote this morning that are worth checking out:

*Ipod is now playing "Ingrid Berman" by Billy Bragg and Wilco off of Mermaid Avenue. They are peoms that Woodie Guthrie never published and that his family asked them to set music to. Also amazing.

"River" by Joanie Mitchell covered by Travis.
"Crawl" by Kings Of Leon from "Only By The Night"
"That Lucky Old Sun" by Johnny Cash from "American Recordings III: Solitary Man"
"The Mercy Seat" by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds from "I Had a Dream, Joe"
"Jezebel" by Lloyd and Glen from the "Trojan Ska Box Set"
"Temptation" by VAST from "Visual Audio Sensory Theater"